Chapter 21 - Chase Me, Cowboy

I wake early, shower the night off, and put my hoodie and shorts on, even though it’s warm. He’s still sleeping—looking delicious and half naked while he’s at it—but he has a little time, so I wheel my bag to the kitchen and make some coffee.

The house feels…strange. Not final, like I expected it to. More like…I could come back sometime.

Maybe in a professional capacity?

Thinking about my choice to end this fling, once and for all, makes me slightly ill. I sip my coffee with my knuckles white on the mug. My emotions are going back and forth in my chest like a ping-pong ball. One second, I want to go into the bedroom and ask him if we can just keep doing this and forget about the music. Then, I think about having to sit at home and watch his career flourish, knowing I gave up on my dream.

I would resent him.

I know I would.

He stirs in the bedroom. The floor creaks, but I don’t turn around. Heat and the rough stubble on his jaw brush the back of my neck. He kisses the nape, and his heavy erection brushes my ass.

I blink hard, forcing down the need to let him take me back to the bedroom. There’s only so long I can stay here and pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist.

“One more time, baby,” he rasps.

I cave, not about the staying part, but I’ll give him this one last thing. I’ll give it to myself, so I have one more memory to take home with me.

“One more time,” I whisper, eyes shut. “Can you pull out?”

He goes still, then runs his jaw along my shoulder. “It’s not smart, but yeah, I can. When is your period due?”

“Next week,” I manage.

“We should be good,” he says, his hands already under the waistband of my shorts. They fall around my ankles, panties right after. Distantly, I hear him spit in his hand and wetness grazes my pussy, his fingers easing my thighs apart. He adjusts my hips, pressing the small of my back to arch it. Then, the head of his cock pushes in, and I close my eyes and relax, gasping as he slides in bare.

“Fuck,” he groans.

He pulls out abruptly, turning me to face him, and lifts me on the counter. He’s so tall; we fit together perfectly at this height. It’s different without the condom, not enough that it’s worth doing this again when the consequences are so high. But enough that I’m rolling my eyes back as he drags out, making a note to savor this because it’s never happening again. Enough to make it worth it.

He thrusts. I gasp, head snapping up, and our eyes locking. The corner of his mouth jerks up.

Damn it…maybe it is worth the consequences.

There must be something in my face because he shakes his head, jaw rippling.

“I’m pulling out,” he says.

I lean in, trying to kiss him and nipping him instead. He falls into me, taking me by the nape of the neck and deepening the kiss. Bumps rise up and down my arms. My heart pumps hard on my tongue, mingled with his taste, but not as hard as he’s pumping between my thighs. We’ve kissed and fucked hard for the last few days, but not like this.

This tastes like desperation.

“Goddamn it,” he breathes, tearing his mouth from mine.

Lightning fast, he pulls out and shudders with his face pushed into my neck. Warmth hits my thigh. It occurs to me, this is the first time he’s ever come on me. I’m elated for a second before I remember, it’s also the last time. My body stiffens, and he draws back, grabbing a paper towel from behind me. I’m cleaned up in seconds, and he’s putting my shorts and panties into place.

Our eyes lock as he wipes his hands.

“Are you—”

“Take me to the airport,” I say. “Please.”