Chapter 23: Astoria - Bound to Ruin

It’s been four years since I’ve seen this notebook. I run my thumb over the cracked leather, my nail picking at some of the cement flakes that cling to it. I frown, running my palm over the cover. It’s thicker than I remember. And lumpier.

Warmth encases me when Jinx reforms her cocoon, sealing out the Weave to keep us safe and hidden, but I barely notice. I flip the notebook open, the leather and old paper crackling.

A long, beaded chain slips from the pages and pools into my awaiting hand, like it had been used as a bookmark.

I never thought I’d see that again, Jinx rumbles from all around.

“What is it?” There’s a little loop at one end that makes holding it up easy. The thread is lined with pearls separated by small, barrel-shaped onyx beads at odd intervals. Some pearls only have one or two barrel beads between them, while others have three or four.

It represents your Entropy Soul Thread. The priesthood would display the lengths and stones like badges of honor. The first red stone at the loop is the beginning of the family line.

I run my finger along the loop. Tiny onyx barrel beads line it to meet with an uncut ruby the size of my fingertip.

Then each onyx bead represents how many birthing cycles the priest participated in before conceiving. Once conceived, the chain would pass on to that child. On and on it would go. Slip your right middle finger through the first loop.

I do as she says, and the chain whips up my hand to wrap around and around my arm in a coil. I hold out my arm to better marvel at it. The pearls reflect the glow of my eyes, and my lips part in wonder. “This is a priesthood relic?”

Yes. It was Gildra’s, but Atticus discovered it within Viola’s room and took it. We thought he destroyed it.

I run my fingers over the pearls. There must be hundreds of them. “Why would Emilia slip it into the notebook? How did she get it?” Something clicks in place, and I suck in breath. “Rossana. Maybe that’s why she fled. She stole it back.”

I wouldn’t be surprised. Both Viola and her grieved for days after the chain was taken. Gildra made them both swear that you would one day be the chain’s safekeeper.

My heart pounds, and I twist my arm. A few rubies of various sizes dangle. I touch one, feeling the two green barrel beads that run along the branching thread that links it back to a pearl.

“Is this malachite?” I turn my arm to find another dangling ruby. This one branches from a pearl with a single blue barrel bead. “And… sapphire?” Three yellow stones link another red bead by my elbow. “Citrine? What are these?”

I told you. It’s the start of a new family line.

“These dangling ones, too?”

I can hear the eye roll. Yes! The priesthood had many new family lines. The blue stones are the start of a new Preservation line. The green, Transformation. And gold, Creation.

“But if the Soul Thread is one single line passed from parent to child…” My fingers tremble when they touch the red stone, my voice dropping to barely a whisper. “Jinx, are these… Dual Threads?”

Clearly.

“For the love of the Weave, Jinx! Do I have to pry it out of you? Pretend I’m a blithering idiot if that’s helpful and actually tell me.”

She sighs heavily. Dual Threads will always have at least two children. One for each of their Soul Threads. They can always sire or birth more children for their partner’s Soul Thread. It’s why they were so honored by the priesthood. The more rubies dangling on a chain, the higher your status.

I press my hand firmly over my heart when my Dual Threads now twist with the Archweaver line. “The Arachnomicon was from a Dual Threaded priest. I thought they could live to adulthood. I never dreamed that they could actually reproduce and pass on both of their threads like that.”

I turn to the notebook. Doomed to extinction stares back at me. “How come Duals stopped thriving? What happened?”

I don’t know. It was a question that plagued Rossana and Gildra.

I release the uncut ruby and watch the small hexagonal rock side to side. Excitement builds as opportunity blooms before me. I am a soul with a powerful demon protector. I could go to parts of the Weave others have only dreamed of. The things I could learn. The mysteries I could uncover. “I think we should explore the Weave.”

Absolutely not. You need to rest.

“I’ve been resting, and look, my chest is better.” I rub the black-stained line that dissects my body. The two halves remain together like it’s nothing more than a mark. “See? I’ll be fine. Let’s go.”

And where exactly do you plan to go? Other than your death.

“You’re being dramatic. I’ll be⁠—”

Devoured by Alasdair if you return to your body.

The rumbling growl quakes my soul form, threatening my perception of my body. I morph like a ripple. “Woah!” I steady again, but I don’t dare move my splayed arms and legs in case it happens again. “What was that?”

You are a soul. Much like when you travel inside yourself to perceive your Soul Threads, you take on the body that you perceive yourself to have. It’s why you’re shaped as you are and why you were able to knit yourself back together when the horror of Alasdair’s attack faded.

“You mean when you ripped open my chest even when I told you not to?” I glare at nothing in particular, since she’s all around me.

I saved you.

“You delayed the inevitable,” I snip back.

And I was able to pull your consciousness from Alasdair’s prison to prevent him from feeding on your pain!

I click my tongue. “Okay, true. But now I’m feeling better. I don’t need to sleep anymore. I need to do something to help Valen and Lucas.”

Jinx’s silence is daunting. I sigh loudly and try again. “I know you’re worried about me, but you need to recognize that I am strong enough. Lucas is heading towards my father right now. He could be there already. If there’s a way for us to help him or break the curse on my body, now is the time to figure it out.”

The silken strands shift before she answers slowly, Alright, but know this. The Weave is a dangerous place for you. You are the equivalent to a lost soul, and there are demons who roam that would devour you. You must stay close to me.

“I promise. We’re a team, Jinx. Where you go, I go.”

The strands around me suck away. Smoke swirls around before dissipating until I stand on that mirrored surface again, the space below my feet glowing and the cosmos arcing above.

Yet my attention is pulled from the wonder of the Weave all around to behold my familiar towering over me in a form that is both familiar and unfamiliar.

Still feline in nature, Jinx’s demon form holds not one but two sets of fangs that hang side by side over her lips, with the smaller set in front of the larger. Her shoulders are massive, with her front legs longer than the back ones to create an elegant sweep down her spine. Three fluffy tails whip in agitation back and forth, leaving behind a trail of smoke that disperses in the darkness. The same smoke billows in a little stream from the tufted tips of her long, thin, pointed ears.

Her black fur holds a breathtaking pattern of stripes and flecks of inky blue and glittering white, resembling a mix between a tiger and jaguar that provides perfect camouflage to the Weave’s night sky. The fur of her mane lies flat against her neck. It creates the appearance of one flat line from the base of her long ears to her massive shoulders.

I touch her strong forearm. “Is this your true form?”

“Yes.” Her voice echoes lightly, the white flecks within her fur’s pattern winking in response to her pitch.

“You’re beautiful, Jinx.” I stroke her silken fur, so lost in her magnificence that I nearly forget where we are.

Jinx turns her head. “Welcome to the Weave, Tori. My first home.”

I follow her gaze and perceive our surroundings without the haze of pain and suffering. Stars flicker in the deep indigo of the night, some so close that we could stroll up to them, others so far that they’re merely specks. Others arc over us like arrows letting loose into the sky, long glittering trails of every color left in their wake.

“Wow,” I say breathlessly, reaching out, but never fully touching any of it.

“The Weave is a vast, wondrous place, populated with creatures as diverse and complex as those in your own world. You’ve called us simply ‘demons,’ which would be as accurate as calling all life in the physical world ‘animals.’ Lost souls who are stuck become ghosts. But not all souls become stuck. Some are able to find their way to the Weave, but they rarely can navigate their way to the center where the Tapestry of Magic lies with its protectors.”

“Why?”

“Because they are easy prey for the soul-devouring demons. The closer you travel to the center, the more dangerous and populated it becomes. Demons hunger for energy and magic, the two things that make up the Tapestry and weavers’ souls. But the protectors are the most powerful creatures within the Weave. They guard the Tapestry, care for the souls, and maintain the threads.”

“Wait, if demons eat souls, does that mean you’d eat me?”

She barks a laugh, her head shaking. “If I was hungry enough, but I am not a soul devourer. Souls have a rather slimy, unsavory texture. Demons like me feed off of deals with weavers or other smaller demons. We syphon off the energy of your Soul Threads.”

“That’s a relief.” I glance up at her. “Where is the Tapestry then?”

Jinx lowers down to her belly. She tilts her head in emphasis. “Hop on. You’ll be able to see when we draw closer, and it’ll be safer to travel than having you in my mouth.”

Even flat on the ground, she is still twice my height with no stepladder in sight. I fist my hands in her mane’s long fur to try to get purchase. The silken strands slip through my fingers like water, and I release my grip to run my fingers through the softness.

“That’s a fascinating sensation.” I comb my fingers again, lips parting as I gaze at how her mane sways as though submerged underwater, just like my long hair does now.

“You’re too slow,” Jinx complains and sweeps her head under me. I’m catapulted screaming into a dizzying spiral to collide on top of her head.

I pant, gripping onto Jinx for dear life. “For fuck’s sake, try not to launch me into those stars!”

Jinx grumbles low in her deep chest, the vibrations rattling my teeth. At least my form doesn’t ripple when she does it. I swivel around on her head and straddle her neck. I immediately sink into her mane with a shocked squeak.

I frown down at the fur surrounding me and wiggle until I’m confident that I’m straddling the base of her neck under all this fur. The mane arcs up in a wave, expanded like her cat tail does when she’s spooked. I hack and splutter the silken tendrils out of my mouth before she flattens it back to a smooth state.

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If I didn’t know any better, I would say that I have become a growth sprouting from her neck. There’s no clear distinction of where I end and where her mane begins. I shift to reassure myself that I do, in fact, have a lower body. “Okay, that feels pretty secure. Are you comfortable with me sitting here?”

“It’s fine,” Jinx growls before she leaps.

I squeal and twist my hands in the long, smooth fur. Her long ears with little tufts at the ends flatten to frame me as she bounds through the dark, twinkling sky of the Weave.

The mirrored surface tires my eyes. Jinx’s feet spark little lights, and my skin crawls as I remember the creepy slug thing that attacked us. “Do you think we’ll be attacked again?”

“I am too fast for most of them, but avoiding them will become difficult when we reach the Tapestry.” Her head swivels, and she swerves. The space beside us ripples, and I flatten myself down onto her when a large, orange eye pops open to track us. “It’s been two thousand years since I was last here. Things might have changed, so stay vigilant.”

This is the most Jinx has ever talked about her past, and I might never get answers from her again. I lean down and rest on her head with my arms crossed. The pearls from the chain on my left arm dig into my chin. “What kind of creatures protect the Tapestry?”

Jinx stays silent for so long, I begin to lose hope until finally she says, “They are much larger than me with many legs and eyes all along the body. They have a…” She sighs exasperatedly and shakes her head, jostling me as she does. She snaps, “Your simple, limited language is endlessly frustrating.”

I scratch her favorite spot behind her ear. “Calm down. You’re doing great. Do the creatures have a name?”

Jinx pauses. “Spiders.”

I snort. “Okay, how is that hard?”

“It’s not actually what they’re called, dimwit. It’s the best translation I can come up with. They have the same eight limbs, but they do not act like spiders of your world. There is… a master, I believe. Ah-ha, a hive! Yes, it’s like a hive with a queen. They tend to her. They used to recognize the difference between demons who mean their Tapestry no harm and those who did. Then one day the cosmos screamed and reality trembled with the force of it. The spiders began to act differently. They killed not for sustenance or protection, but for the violence. I never dared to get too close again. I witnessed enough horrors before abandoning this place to become a familiar.”

“A queen. Have you ever met her?”

“No. I only know of her existence.”

Silence falls between us, and it allows my mind to wander to the painful things I’m trying to forget. Lucas is on his way to the Archweaver estate alone. He’s so powerful. So clever. But he is one human, and the three of us barely made it out alive last time.

He’ll die to save me, and if he succeeds, I could not stand existence without him.

My only hope is Valen and Emilia. Perhaps they can drag Lucas back to safety. But how long can I exist as a lost soul within the Weave?

A tear slips down my face. I’m so lost with no idea what to do. Lucas and Valen may die, and I can’t do anything to help them.

Jinx slows her run to a stroll, and I open my eyes when her voice rumbles softly. “Thousands of years ago, whispers and cries echoed throughout the Weave. Much like when you felt Lucas and Valen’s cries for you, we heard the wails of those who suffered and begged the universe for guidance and wisdom, or even companionship. We answered through your mirrors.”

My eyes widen, and I ease up to leaning on my elbows. She hasn’t told me stories in so long. “Were you the demons that whispered the secrets of magic to the priesthood?”

“Yes, we were. Your kind were such small, insignificant creatures, but lived in a physical world that was beyond our comprehension. We were as curious about you as you were about us. Eventually, priests were able to open portals for us, and many demons left for the physical world. Those who remained formed bonds with a select few; we enjoyed watching your short lives play out, and even guided your souls back to the Tapestry if you became lost after death.”

“Who did you speak with?”

“Uldra. She is the red stone at the beginning of your chain. She was a powerful high priest with the threads of Entropy and Transformation.”

I touch the rough uncut ruby where it sits on my middle finger. “Uldra,” I whisper. I trail to the other pearls that represent the souls of my ancestors. “Did you know all the souls on this chain?”

“Yes.”

I trace the other rubies dangling from blue, green, and gold threads. “I had no idea you were a soul guide.”

She scoffs. “Do not belittle my importance. I was your family’s guardian. A household god, revered and worshipped by your ancestors. It was a joy, and I could visit you all within the Tapestry to ensure the spiders were taking good care of your souls. I’d even chased away any malicious creature who tried to sneak onto the Tapestry. As I said, things changed. The spiders no longer recognized me, and I was forced from the Tapestry to the outer ring of the Weave.”

Her three tails swish in agitation. “So many of Uldra’s descendants screamed for me during Alvius’ rise to power and the slaughter of the priesthood. So many lost souls were devoured. I tried to save those I could reach in time, but I could no longer deliver them directly to the Tapestry. If I was too close, the spiders would confuse me with one of the devourers, and I’d risk death.”

I place my hand flat on her head. “That sounds awful.”

She tilts her head into my touch. “It’s been millennia, and I can still hear their cries. Some days, it’s all I can hear.”

I stroke her and rest my upper body back on her head.

She sighs, her mighty shoulders expanding and dropping with the force of it. “It is painful for me to remember. It’s why I do not speak of it. I miss the golden age of the priesthood, and reliving the horrors and all I’ve lost is…”

She shakes her head and resumes her walk. An exhaustion hangs heavy in her voice as she continues her tale. “A few of the priesthood escaped the slaughter and hid among the Astrum Order, swearing loyalty to Alvius in exchange for their lives. Only one of Uldra’s descendants escaped the purge. She became Giuliana Rosemont.”

“Giuliana…” I snatch up the notebook and flick through the yellowed pages quickly until I come across Rossana’s elegantly looped handwriting. Valen’s mother had devoted her early years to trying to solve the declining weaver population issue and had filled her pages with family trees. My mother had assisted her in the hopes of saving the Rosemont line.

Finally, I find my mother’s spiky hand and trace the Rosemont family tree as it branches out onto the pages. I follow it until I come across Giuliana at the top, where she married into the family.

Jinx continues, “Then, Giuliana called on me. The black flame, Uldra’s gift to her descendants, had turned ravenous. It was devouring her grandchildren. She was so old, but she begged me for help. I knew I could not stop the black flame forever. I told her as much, but I could slow it. Maybe give her line a chance to discover why it was turning on them after generations of skilled wielding it with no issue. She accepted me, and I bound to her Soul Thread.”

My fingers trail along the Rosemont family tree that thins more and more until only Gildra remained. Doomed for extinction.

My heart thumps painfully. “What happened? Did it grow too strong?”

“No. It was I who grew too weak.”

I jolt. “You weakened? Why did you weaken?”

Jinx laughs. “There are some things that cannot be changed. It is the nature of the physical world to atrophy. From the moment a mortal is birthed, they are already dying. It is the beauty and curse of your existence. Everything ends.”

My heart pounds, and sweat that doesn’t exist chills me. I can barely speak. “But you’re a demon. You’ve lived for thousands of years.”

“But even I have limits, my stubborn girl. In the physical world, I atrophy. That is the curse I accepted when I came through Giuliana Rosemont’s mirror.”

“But, why?”

“Because I love Uldra. I love her lineage. I could not leave you, Tori. I loved you from the moment you kicked me for daring to nap on Gildra’s stomach. I swore I would stay with you until you no longer needed me.”

I sit up with a wave of mind-numbing sickness. “Stop. Okay, I get it. But why did the black flame start devouring the Rosemont line? Was it not like that in the time of the priesthood?”

“No. It was not.”

I tap the notebook’s yellowed pages. “Alvius Androclaria wrote about how magic was dying. How he came to discover the Tapestry and saw how the priesthood had damaged it. Perhaps what he found is causing the spiders to turn violent.”

She nods. “Could be. I’ll take you as far as I can within the Tapestry. If there is a way for you to break free of Alasdair’s curse or find a way to help Lucas, it would be within those threads.”

The excitement of exploring magical secrets dies quickly with a dripping chill. “But what if the spiders attack you?”

“Then you’ll need to jump from me to save yourself if I cannot get us away. Once you are on the Tapestry, your soul will feel like all the others that rest within the threads. I will not be able to find you until your soul returns to your body.”

“But Jinx… what if I get lost in the Tapestry?”

“You’ll be safe and eventually become one within the Tapestry like all other souls.”

I pause, frowning. “Wait. I’ll die if I’m in the threads? How long do I have before getting absorbed?”

“I have no idea. A lost soul would instantly absorb, but that won’t happen as fast for the living. So you’d be okay for a bit.”

I swallow and tuck the notebook safely away. “Okay, so to play it safe for once in my life, let’s avoid the spiders at all costs and stay together.”

“And if that fails, then your soul joining the Tapestry is a great backup plan. Way better than anything I could come up with.”

“I’d be dead!” I cuff her ear.

Her ear flicks and smacks me in the face. “And safe in the afterlife! It’s better than I ever thought you’d receive. I was sure you’d end up a doomed lost soul.”

Her pitch and prance are way too chipper for me. I hiss angrily while folding my arms over my chest, “Glad my death is a win for you.”

“Me too.” I scoff, and Jinx begins to run again. “Now keep your eyes open. A little farther and you’ll start to see the Tapestry’s glow.”