Prologue: Elliott - Wrong Date, Right Mates
By Thalia Flume
It’s a match! Alden and Elliott. Time to turn up the heat.
* * *
Alden
Wow. I’m speechless. Literally. I never thought you’d pick me, and now I don’t know what to say because I have no game.
Elliott
Hey, at least you’re honest… Unless pretending to have no game is your game.
Alden
Nope. No one would be this awkward on purpose.
Wait. I’m not trying to fish for compliments. Don’t compliment me. I’m supposed to be complimenting you.
Elliott
Okay. Then I won’t tell you I was shocked someone like you would want to talk to me too.
Alden
Please. You’re way prettier than me. My hair is boring. Your hair is like a renaissance painting.
Elliott
I see what you mean about having no game.
Alden
BRB I need to think of a witty reply.
So, you’re a journalist?
Elliott
Wait. Where’s your witty reply?
Alden
I couldn’t think of one. Take pity on me. 😭
Elliott
Okay, but only because you’re hot.
Alden
Phew. Pretty privilege saves the day.
Elliott
🙄I write lifestyle articles. Nothing investigative or groundbreaking, but I have my own column about omega dating life.
Alden
That’s so cool! It’s a shame though…
Elliott
???
Alden
What are you going to write about after I take you off the market?
Elliott
🥴 No game. No game at all.
Alden
Told you.
Elliott
Okay. Your turn. What does it mean to ‘work in philanthropy’?
Alden
I hate this question. It always changes my relationships.
Elliott
Technically, this isn’t a relationship. It’s an arrangement. So, there’s no pressure.
Alden
Ouch.
Elliott
What? I have to test you out during a heat before I commit.
Alden
Wow.
Elliott
I’m teasing you. Now answer my question. Are you independently wealthy?
Alden
… Not independently.
Elliott
🤨 What does that mean? Do you have a sugar daddy?
Alden
Ew. Don’t talk about my dad that way!
Elliott
You know, you could have just said you manage donations or something if you didn’t want to flex about your not-independent wealth.
Alden
Good idea. I’ll save that for next time.
Elliott
Next time?
Alden
What if I don’t pass your test? I’m a terrible test-taker. My parents got me a tutor and everything.
Elliott
Please don’t bring your tutor to my heat.
Alden
📝 Noted.
“What’s that smile for?” Noel asks, eying me from his reflection in the mirror over the back of our door.
I lift my head from my phone. “Huh?”
“Let me guess. You’re talking to your alpha, again?” Noel scoops pomade out of the container. “What’s his name again? Al-something. Albert? Alfredo? Alfonso?”
“Alden. Like All-den,” I correct. Again. “Stop making fun of his name.” I pluck a spicy Cheeto from the bag with my chopsticks, and pop it into my mouth.
“Hey, it might not even be his name.” Noel tousles his hair. “For all you know, he’s using an alias.”
“He’s not. You have to take a photo with your ID when you sign up.”
“ID cards can be faked. What if he’s a sociopath and abducts you?”
I shrug and eat another Cheeto. “It’ll make for an entertaining article.”
Noel scowls. “Not funny.”
My roomie needs to take a break from the true crime podcasts. But I secretly love that he worries about me. It’s a sign of care I never received from my workaholic parents, or an alpha.
“I’ll meet him in a public place, then. I can’t review the app without testing the safety and privacy measures they claim to have. Besides, I’m not stupid.”
“Your omega is, though,” Noel says.
I toss a spicy Cheeto at his head. It lands in his hair. Bullseye.
He inhales a gasp straight from the telenovelas he loves to watch with his sisters. “How dare you?”
He crosses the room and swipes the chopsticks from my hand faster than I can react, then turns them on me and pinches my arm.
“Ouch.” I swat him away. “Okay. Okay. I’m sorry. I’ll never touch your hair again.”
* * *
Alden
If you could have the perfect heat, what would it be like?
Elliott
Safe. Quiet. Private. I don’t need much.
Alden
Come on, omega. That’s the bare minimum.
Elliott
Maybe you should tell other alphas that.
Alden
🤬 Who do I need to fight?
Elliott
That was a joke.
Alden
Good. I was about to avenge you.
Elliott
No avenging necessary. 😂
Alden
What was your last heat like?
Elliott
Tell me yours first.
Alden
It ended before it started.
Elliott
How?
Alden
The omega’s ex showed up on the lawn with a boom box like an old rom-com and begged him for a second chance.
Elliott
Was it an old boom box or a Bluetooth speaker?
Alden
The latter.
Elliott
Yikes.
Alden
Right? Okay, your turn.
Elliott
It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t very private.
A shadow looms over my screen.
“That’s one way to describe an orgy,” Noel says with a laugh.
I lock my phone and spin my desk chair toward him. “Don’t orgy-shame me.”
“Whatever you say, babe. You’re the one with a sex column.”
* * *
Alden
What’s your favorite heat-related snack?
Elliott
Why do I feel like you’re interrogating me?
Alden
Because I am. I’m building a heat plan. Like a birth plan, but for heats.
Elliott
You are such a dork.
Alden
I don’t know. You’re still talking to me so something’s working.
Come on, what do you like to eat while you’re in heat?
Elliott
I’m usually too queasy, but I’m always thirsty.
Alden
Smoothies and milkshakes, got it. What about kombucha?
Elliott
There’s only one kind of cum I want when I’m in heat.
Alden
I’m blushing.
Favorite color?
Elliott
Peach, but I don’t see how that has anything to do with my heat.
Alden
🍑 Peach? I’m starting to think you’re flirting with me.
Favorite condiment?
Elliott
Stop. There’s no way that’s relevant.
Alden
Mustard is mine. Anything but mayo.
Elliott
You don’t like mayo? Wow. What’s it like to go through life eating improperly dressed sandwiches?
Seriously though, I don’t need you to go to great lengths. Just provide a safe place for me.
Alden
Sorry. I like to spoil.
What if we met for lunch out by me? There’s this taco place I love, and we can walk to the beach after.
Then maybe if you’re feeling comfortable, I can give you a tour of my house?
Elliott
But what if I hate sand?
Alden
I knew you had a flaw somewhere.
Elliott
Oh, I have others.
I sunburn easily.
My grocery bills are always high because I love bougie produce. I eat Cheetos with chopsticks because I hate the feeling of Cheeto dust on my fingers.
Alden
That’s not a flaw. It’s genius.
What kind of expensive produce?
Elliott
No. I’m not falling for that. You can’t put my favorite foods on the heat plan.
Alden
Fine. But we’ll have to work on your sand aversion. I’ll carry you down on a cart like royalty if I have to.
Elliott
😆😆😆Alden
Seriously. I want to meet you.
I type out a single word reply: When?
My finger hovers over the send button. I worry my bottom lip. This is a terrible idea.
I hit send.