Chapter 20: Twenty - A London Haunting: A Christmas Ghost Story

The bone Janice had thrown Lottie’s way was…interesting. It tied in with something Aunt Dot had touched on too. But was it real, this subject Lottie was now delving into? Or pure fantasy – imagination, even – on the part of others? Would it truly lead to answers? There was no way of knowing. Not unless she could get inside No.142 again. That was the real issue now: how to find a valid enough reason to do that.

Christmas.

That was the excuse. Surely. A time of reconnection.

She should get on the bus, go round there again, and this time knock on the door – yell through the letterbox if she had to, ‘Reggie, it’s Lottie. I’ve got a card for you.’

He’d either answer or he wouldn’t. And if he didn’t, she could post the card with a note pleading with him to call her, or at least answer the phone when she called him.

She could come clean in the note, tell him how worried she was about him – but not why. Not about what could be happening. She hadn’t told anyone about Janice’s theory yet, hadn’t even discussed it with Cam. If it was true – if – it needed to be explained to Reggie face-to-face, and carefully. Mishandled, it could be dangerous.

Where, oh where, was the time going? Christmas was sprinting to the finish line. Jack and Amelia were arriving tomorrow, just a few days before the big one itself. His room was freshly decorated, a new duvet and covers bought, the house sparkling from top to bottom, filled with the smell of freshly baked mince pies and sausage rolls. It was the perfect festive setting, yet still Jenny was flapping.

“Amelia’s vegetarian,” Jenny had announced just minutes ago, practically squealing as she broke the news to Lottie. “Vegetarian! And only now Jack tells me!”

“And why’s that a problem?” Lottie asked.

“Why’s that a problem? Why’s that a problem? Because I’ve brought a ruddy great turkey, that’s why! A bronze turkey. I thought that’s what we were all having – perfect, simple, like always. But if she’s vegetarian, she’s not going to eat turkey, is she? What the hell do I feed her instead?”

Lottie shrugged. “I don’t know. She could have the roast potatoes and veggies, couldn’t she? You’re making a cauliflower cheese too?”

“Yes! Of course – don’t I always?”

“That’ll be enough then.”

Jenny was beside herself at Lottie’s casual attitude.

“It’s Christmas, Lottie! Christmas! She’s spending it with us – us! I am not serving her everything but the bloody turkey. No, it has to be more special than that. Right, get the cookbooks down. Let’s see what we can find as an alternative.”

“Mum––“

“Lottie––“

“Mum!” Lottie’s voice rose sharply, stopping Jenny in her tracks.

“What?” Jenny said, panting slightly. “I see you’ve got your coat on. Where are you rushing off to now? What could possibly be more important than this?”

“I’m going to Reggie’s,” Lottie said.

“Reggie’s? Oh, for goodness sake, you were sacked from that job, and just as well, given the shenanigans going on there.”

Lottie couldn’t believe it. “Shenanigans? Mum, you saw what went on – you were right in the middle of it.” The cause of it, she almost added. “And you just want to do what – forget about it? Leave him there alone, when it could all happen again?”

She could see her mum battling with herself, torn between her own domestic dilemma and one that firmly belonged to another.

“I do feel sorry for him,” Jenny said at last. “But I feel sorry for a lot of people, to be honest – the homeless freezing on the streets, the lonely elderly of course, and the young, who can be just as lonely. This time of year, it all comes to a head, doesn’t it? The sadness as much as the happiness. But sometimes, Lottie Beck – just sometimes – you have to take care of your own. That’s all I’m doing here, so I’ll thank you not to judge me for it. Poor Reggie,” she went on, softening. “I haven’t forgotten what happened, but what can I do about it? The last time I tried, I ended up with a caution from the police! And you will too if you don’t accept you can’t help everyone, okay? The burdens of this world aren’t all yours to carry, even though…even though…” She broke off, blinking. “Even though you try so hard.”

Were those tears glinting in her mum’s eyes? Lottie peered closer. They were!

“Mum?”

Jenny waved a hand. “Sorry, Lottie, but…we’re so proud of you, me and Tony. You’re a good girl. But please, can you just help me find something I can cook for Amelia for Christmas Day? I don’t know, a nut roast or something! Isn’t that what vegetarians are meant to like? Lottie, darling, focus on us for a change.”

Focus on us?

Perhaps her mum had a point. Reggie’s card was in her bag, and she would deliver it – but later. Jack and Amelia were due tomorrow, and three days after that, it would be Christmas Eve. She still had plenty of time to do what she intended.

Sometimes charity began at home – especially at Christmas.

As she took off her coat, her mum smiled – a rather cheeky smile, actually.

“Grab the cookbooks,” she said. “And do you know what I’m going to grab?”

“What?” Lottie asked.

“The ruddy sherry,” Jenny replied with a wink.

It was beginning to feel a lot like Christmas. The hangover Lottie woke up with the next morning – thanks to too much sherry – confirmed it. Some old school friends had been in touch too, suggesting a reunion, and Jack and Amelia had arrived – Amelia as pretty as a doll, and Jack every bit the cat who’d got the cream. Jenny – also hungover – continued to fuss and fluster, while Tony buried himself behind a newspaper in the corner, clearly hoping to stay out of the chaos.

It was family life – and Lottie loved it.

Then Cam had surprised her with an invitation to meet his family, and though she’d felt nervous – it seemed such a big step, official somehow – Lottie had loved that too; the way they’d welcomed her into the fold with plenty of hugs and kind words.

It was a whirlwind of activity, with Lottie finding herself still heeding what her mother had said, and so the card for Reggie remained in her bag, undelivered, all thoughts she’d had about him lately – along with Janice’s theory – receding. Cam, too, was swept up in the Christmas rush, trying to juggle everything alongside the demands of his job – one he swore he was quitting after the holidays.

“To do what?” Lottie had asked, when they’d managed a quick phone call.

“I’ll get something else,” he’d said. “But eventually I want to go back to studying. Just need to figure out what course will suit me. So yeah, I’m applying to college in the new year. Get another job to tide me over in the meantime – a day job.”

“Start…where?” When Jack had gone to uni, it had been hundreds of miles away. Would Cam do the same? She needn’t have worried.

“London,” he told her. “Definitely London. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

A burst of happiness bloomed inside her at that, followed by the memory of what the old man in the pub had once said – the night she and Cam first kissed – the quote from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, ‘I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach.’

Was that what was happening here? A future? Not just for her, but for Jack and Amelia too – for her mum and Tony – all of them on course for a happily ever after?

She could only hope so, trying not to spoil the moment with thoughts of those less fortunate, or with promises she’d once made to herself.

What was happening now – the magic of Christmas – didn’t she have a right to it? Especially after Matt. After knowing the depths of loss. That nagging feeling about another old man – one who wouldn’t let her near him – surely it would fade.

In time.

There was so much activity around her, every minute of every day packed to the hilt, making her wonder how she’d ever had time to work, especially at this time of year. Laughter filled the air and the house glowed with lights and warmth.

And still, Reggie’s Christmas card stayed put. A card that would have to be binned soon if she didn’t deliver it – the lid slamming down on it, literally and metaphorically.

It was too late. Just…too late. Despite everything she’d learned, despite the angle Janice had steered her towards. Was it all just clutching at straws?

Christmas Eve now. Definitely too late.

Lottie was on the brink of accepting that more fully, when Cam appeared on her doorstep, far earlier than planned. Not beaming, as she was, but grim-faced.

No sooner had she opened the door to him than her mobile rang, Jingle Bells blaring, so cheerful before, now grating as she took in Cam’s expression.